Unwritten rules

I started thinking about this topic today because I am trying to read the new Jennifer Crusie/Bob Mayer book, Don't Look Down. I would pick it up, read a page, put it down, pick it up, read a couple more pages, put it down. Repeat. I started the book on Monday and here it is Friday and I'm on page 98. Normally I would have two books finished in that time. But I will persist because it's getting good now.

Anyway, I digress. My point is the hero has just done something that breaks one of the unwritten rules of romance: he has cheated on the heroine with another woman. Now don't get too excited because the H/H just met that morning and have never even kissed or made love at this point. But the reader can tell from their internal thoughts that they are very attracted to each other although with a touch of hostility. So technically he hasn't cheated, right?

The reason I bring this up is because I have read countless message boards with people ranting about this kind of thing because most women prefer that the instant the H/H meet they don't 'cheat' on each other even if stuff keeps them apart for most of the book. It's like an unwritten rule. And if the H/H marry other people the loves scenes are only vaguely alluded to or implied (and of course, it was very bad sex) or not mentioned at all.

In DLD, the hero finds a naked actress in his bed and he gets an eyefull of her breasts. And she wants to touch his gun :) So what's a guy to do? Of course, you guessed it. He turns out the light and we use our imaginations.

I can think of a several books where the hero cheats during the course of the book, but they were all historicals. But I can't think of any contemporaries. And I mean romance not women's fiction.

One of my first thoughts when I read this scene was that the male co-author probably influenced this aspect of the story because I can't think of any book where Crusie has the hero 'cheating' on the heroine. I've never read Mayer. Am I being sexist here? I just can't think of a single male with no attachments or commitments who wouldn't take advantage of this situation.

While this 'cheating' scene made me a bit uncomfortable, it's not a book-killer. I want to finish it especially since it's just getting good. So someone tell me, is this book not considered a romance? Maybe it's crossing over into women's fiction. I suppose the lines between women's fiction and romance are starting to blur, but if it doesn't have an HEA, it's going back to the library. So I may need to 'cheat' and read the last chapter.