Sugar is eeeevil

This past summer I lost 15 pounds on Weight Watchers and reached my goal weight (again). In September I went in for my yearly (yuk) physical. Dr. C and I chatted about a bunch of stuff. I mentioned that I had just lost 15 pounds and she said "Wow, that's a lot of weight for someone with your small frame. You certainly don't need to lose any more weight." I told her she was my new best friend. What a sweetie she is because let me say I am not small framed and feel I should probably lose 10 to 15 more pounds. But over the years I have come to accept that is not realistic for me. I am very happy now to fit into a size medium. And 10 more pounds won't get rid of the saddlebags. I tried that many years ago and I ended up with no butt and still with those blasted (inherited from mom) saddlebags. And there was no way I could maintain that weight.

Anyway, I remember reading a book a while back (can't remember the name, should have written it down) that mentioned the heroine of 5'6" and 120 pounds was average. Excuse me? Is it just me or am I living on the wrong planet? I hate when I read something like this 'cuz it makes me feel like a fat cow. I'm 5'4" and I will never be close to 120 pounds.

My problem now is sugar. Ever since the middle of October I have been bingeing on carbs, mainly sugar. I mentioned before that I have a mild case of SAD and one of the symptoms is a tendency to binge on carbs. Every year I do this at this time of year and it lasts till about March. Of course, with Halloween, Thanksgiving and Christmas, it's a losing battle and too easy to tell myself that I will start over again in the spring. I'm so sick of that. Sugar has become my drug of choice. Someone lock me up (with a bag of books of course). I'm up a few pounds but I still fit in my clothes although I don't think I will for long so I'll be getting my 'fat' clothes back out.

So CindyS reminded me about the SAD lights and I have been actively searching online. I'm going to need two, one for work and one for home. I have my own office at work which is terrific considering my last job (I sat in a server lab - noisy, cold, no personal space, horrible) but I have no window. I don't really expect a SAD light to help me with the bingeing problem, just help with my mood and lack of energy. I'll be back again to Weight Watchers in the spring to lose my winter weight and hope it's not the whole 15 pounds (or more). But if it is, that's OK. I've done it before and I can do it again.